Wednesday, June 21, 2006

Calling all twin parents....

Ok, I know there are several twin parents who drop in once in awhile - and I have a question - especially for those of you who have boy/girl twins.

When do you put them in separate rooms?

Tanner & Morgan have been in the same room since they came home from the NICUs, and that worked well for the most part. In early June, we moved them downstairs to their "big kids" room(s). We put their beds in one room - and then we are letting them use the other room for their play room.

This works fine - but our son needs more sleep than our daughter does. And, she will carry on and keep him up some nights. Other times, when one of them is awake in the middle of the night, it means they are both awake in the middle of the night. And, on the weekends, during nap time, I know they aren't getting as much sleep as they could if they were in different rooms.

Since, they are boy/girl twins, they are going to eventually be in their own rooms - but I've heard people making the separation as early as 4 months - and as late as 12 years.

Any advice?

11 comments:

Tonya said...

love the picture below :) Sometimes I wish I had twins!! actually I think I wish it alot but then I can be thankful it is just one..lol

Sorry I cant help you with the bedrooms situation not having twins and all but im sure it would not make much difference when you switch them.. it would make things alot easier :)

Sarah, Goon Squad Sarah said...

Mine are two and they are still together.

I asked this question to a panel of twin-moms and they mostly agreed that the right time was whenever your kids said they wanted their own rooms.

However, in your case, I'd say if you have enough space in your house try it out and see how they do. If they both sleep better now may be right.

(I'm just not ready to give up my computer room yet)

Dana said...

Hi Stacy! My 2 share a room. I would say 90% of the time they sleep through each other's squawks. We currently do not have another option. BUT! We are building a house and could put them in separate rooms then. However - I think my 2 are so used to each other - and I think for me- keeping them in the same room also means keeping them on the same schedule! Which means a break for me!!!

I think you have to go with your gut on this one. If you feel your son needs more sleep for his health reasons - then do it! You can always put them back into together at a later date. Or not. Good luck - keep us posted!

Amy said...

Glad you asked. I've been wondering the same thing. At one year, I know I'm not ready yet, but I do have to scoop Brayden up the minute he starts crying because Baylee is such a light sleeper. Brayden, on the other hand, sleeps through ANYTHING--well, short of teething, anyway. I thought maybe when they are 3, but lately I've been thinking about when they are closer to school age.

Upside Up said...

hey. goon squad sarah sent me over here to help with this question. here's our experience: my girls have been in the same room since the beginning, and they're almost 4. they always sleep through each other's nighttime wakeups and they would be very upset if i tried to separate them. as it is, we have them taking naps in separate rooms, yet they often beg and plead for me to let them nap together. this so they can play like they're in a bounce-house (sometimes resulting in the curtains being pulled off the wall). other twin moms i know had to separate around 2 y.o. because they never acclimated to each other's noise. this is to say, if they show signs of needing to separate, and if you've got the space, i'd go ahead and give it a try. the longer you wait, the more traumatic it may (or may not) be for them to change their routine. and hey -- it may work miracles for you. (when my girls turned 3 last year, we thought they were done napping bc they didn't nap anymore. but someone suggested the separation, i reluctantly tried it, and a year later, they still take a 2-3 hour nap almost every day. now that's a miracle!)

macboudica said...

I would love to have enough space in my house to put every kid in a different room. Unfortunately that is not an option here. If you have the space and one kids is keeping the other up, by all means do what you have to do. Having one kid be cranky and sleep deprived isn't doing anyone any favors.

geenalyn said...

i have girl/girl twins that just turned 3. They share a room...and they sleep thru each other's cries in teh nights when they happen. They have stopped napping (about 6mos ago now). I tried the seperating thing for the naps and they just got hysterical about being apart.
I say if you have the space try it out with seperating them...and if they are okay with it then do it permanently, but if they freak out over it then wait a bit longer...

Laura said...

Hey! I came over from Sarah's site.

I have two sets of toddler age twins - boy/girl twins who are almost 3 and fraternal girls who are 18 months. (Yeah. I know.)

We used to have the three girls in one room and the boy in a room by himself, but he became much more withdrawn and we started worrying about him being all by himself as the sole boy. We moved his twin sister back in with him and things have been great. They do keep each other up a bit, but I can sneak in and get the awake one out of there before the sleeping one wakes up, so it's usually not a big deal. I honestly don't have plans to separate them until they're much older. I like that they have a buddy. When they wake up in the morning, they chat for a good 20 minutes, playing and stuff, before I have to go get them!

Christine said...

We separated our boy/girl twins when they were around 2 1/2 [they are now 6 1/2]. Our twins sound similar to yours. Our girl doesn't need as much sleep as our boy. We have five kids and she is the only girl. She really liked having her own space where she could keep the boys out. Our boy, on the other hand, did not want to be alone so he is sharing a room with his baby brother [who is now 4]. If it were me, I would go ahead and separate them and see how they do. They may end up crawling in bed together on rainy nights, but if it gets your boy some more sleep do it.

Samantha said...

My twins (girls 3 1/2) also have a playroom and a seperate room for their beds. I've never tried to seperate them so I dont know how they'd do. My dilemma is this: they start headstart in August...do we keep them together or seperate them?? They fight like crazy, but on the rare occasion that they are seperated from each other, they seem sooooooo melancholy. My suggestion to you would be to try them in seperate rooms... if it doesnt work, you can switch them back to being together :) If anyone could possibly visit my blog with advice on the school thing...I'd appreciate it so much :)

Michelle said...

I've got twin boys - and one definately needs more sleep than the other. If I had it to do over....I think I would have separated them when I moved them to 2 cribs (or shortly after). I can't imagine separating them now.

Is there a way that when you do "quiet time" you can let your daughter up early so that your son can sleep longer during the day? That might equalize the nighttime thing. Other than that - I'm with the others, they will know when it is "time" to have their own rooms. Although - I think by first grade is a good rule - that is when sleepovers usually start,,,,,,